Thursday, November 13, 2008

Pop Quiz!


Don't you love the tests the universe gives?

If you don't do well...no worries!! The universe ALWAYS gives you another chance.

Even if you do well - you've aced that test - if the universe thinks that you might just need the test again...well, VOILA!!! The test presents itself!

Yet again.

And again.

Damned pop quizzes.



So the pop quiz for me came last night during my tai chi class.

A new person arrived to take the class, and it became clear to me that he was not there for tai chi. He showed no interest. He looked toward the ceiling in boredom when the class was working on fundamentals. He only made eye contact when smirking at others. He asked questions about my background, but interrupted the answers with his own.

After class I found out he studies with another teacher whom I don't know. He's here to...well, I still don't really know - and that really isn't the issue. The issue is that I wanted to punch him in the face.

In taiji, when an opponent's force comes in, you are relaxed, you yield and deflect. You shift to your opponent's incoming energy so that he/she can't connect to your root, control you, and knock you down. That's a tenet of internal martial arts like taiji.

It's very similar to not allowing yourself to get emotional over situations. If someone insults you, you yield and deflect the insult by being grounded in your being. You are. And nothing can shake that. You smile and are still at peace.

I was not so grounded in my being. I felt the need to defend my class, my self, my teaching...my ego...for many minutes after class.

I finished tidying up the studio. Took a nice deep breath. I am. It is. Words dissolve. Emotions settle. I smile and feel at peace. And I laugh because I screwed up the test again.

But that's okay. I'm sure I'll get another chance.

Peace.

4 comments:

  1. love love love your honesty. humbling as it is, thank you for putting it out there. I love you, too!
    K

    ReplyDelete
  2. Thank you, Karin.

    It's not always easy to admit I'm...less than perfect...no matter how clear that is.

    But writing it out is helping me...s.l.o.w.l.y...see the places where I've been distracted off the path of love and compassion - as cheesy as that may sound, it's true for me. Hopefully these distracted side trips will lessen, the path will be taken, the taiji will play, and all will be good in the world.

    And if not, there's always another test. Sigh.

    ;^)

    Thanks for being part of it all.
    Love you too.

    ReplyDelete
  3. I think I might be able to learn something from you. I believe in what you say, and wish I had more control over my energy in these situations.

    Oh tests....why do I not like tests...

    ReplyDelete
  4. Maybe learn what not to do...(grin)

    ReplyDelete